I have no idea how you came across my blog. Maybe Blogging101, or a tag I wrote, a tweet, or a comment I left on your blog (please tell me, I’m curious).
If you follow me for a reason (my photography, book reviews, or maybe my reflections about my now monotonous life), you are probably “expecting” a specific type of blog posts, and for that I feel in a certain way guilty for not writing them.
One of my oldest friends in the Blogosphere, Sandeep, wrote a beautiful post a couple of days ago. She said that, when she started her blog, she did it for herself, to express her thoughts and emotions. “I never wrote for you, it was always about me”: that phrase stuck in my mind, I have thought about it since then.
As I said what seems years ago, I continue to go back and forth between topics I really want to write about and others that I enjoy but I post about only because I feel they could attract more people, or because I feel the need to publish something. It’s not that I don’t like them, I mean, I really feel like that when I’m on finals for example, but it’s that when you distractedly scroll down the end of the post, you don’t have anything more than when you started. Like another Facebook quiz or funny game everybody’s talking about, or some of those lists like “X reasons you…” that are EVERYWHERE. What remains of Ruzzle, The Dress or “How’s your Facebook soul mate?” after a week?
I also have “language attacks“: not being English one of my mother tongues, and being a kinda perfectionist person when we talk about languages, I often feel I could write my posts better, or that there are thousands of hidden errors I cannot spot that are horrifying everybody.
This post was to tell you that I love you, I love seeing your likes and comments, but/and I’m going to try to stop publishing posts I don’t fully believe on / I want to delete after one day because they’ve already wearied me, and go back to what I really feel. It is hard, because working and studying, when I arrive home I just eat, shower and go to sleep, and I don’t have anything to tell because I don’t read, watch TV series or have a life to talk about lately, so when I want to write here, because I miss blogging, I just end up writing not the most fascinating stuff or just not doing it, but I’m going to try harder. For the first time I really believe in a blog. This will last, I’m sure.
I can’t wait to move to London so I will have a lot of adventures, pictures and funny and interesting stories for you.
Maybe we can meet for a coffee? What do you think? :)
Have a lovely day,
Relaxing music to listen while reading or chilling: